I was at lunch a couple weeks ago with some girlfriends and we were talking about our kids. We got on the subject of all the nude pics and sexting going on with this generation and how common it is. As I was sitting there I was feeling a little hopeless thinking about my children and the things they will be facing. We were saying how scary it is. Someone mentioned how awful our world is getting. I then said, "Actually I think our world is getting better." Just then I felt like my friends looked at me like I had three heads. lol! Most people do when I say that. Then I said, "Yeah it does suck that some kids are sending nude pics and sexting but honestly when I think back to being a teen most kids I knew were doing the "real" in person deed." My friends said, "How do you think the world is better?!" Well there's actually a lot of ways. Here are some of my beliefs comparing history to modern day...
1. In the early 1900's life expectancy was about 32 years old. It's now about 80 years old. (And several of those 80 to 90 year olds are living a beautiful vital life:)
2. Teen pregnancy has significantly declined over the last decade.
3. Women have more rights than they ever have.
4. It is illegal to discriminate against a certain race/religion in the workplace, schools or business.
5. People have more religious rights to practice and say how they feel then they ever have.
6. Gay marriage is now legal in the U.S. (Which says to me we are becoming more accepting and loving of others.)
7. Extreme poverty has fallen worldwide from over 50% to now about 15%. We are living in the most economically prosperous time in history.
8. Child mortality rates have significantly declined as well as infant mortality rates. (This makes me SO happy to know!)
9. There is far less violence! Deaths from war have decreased by mass amounts since the 1950's.
10. Literacy rates and education have rapidly increased around the world.
There are several more statistics to support my belief so I will list some links at the end if you'd like to check them out. Even though our world IS getting better I believe our perspective on this wonderful gift of life needs to improve drastically. There seems to be far more anxiety, depression, self harming and suicide then ever before. I feel this is because our society is far removed from who we REALLY are and our purpose in life. Let's lighten up and enjoy this journey together. Focus on the good and the beauty all around and you will surely find it my friend! I'll end with the words of one of my favorite songs What a Wonderful World.
"I see trees of green, red roses too. I see them bloom for me and you. And I think to myself what a wonderful world. I see skies of blue and clouds of white. The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night. And I think to myself what a wonderful world. The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky. Are also on the faces of people going by. I see friends shaking hands saying how do you do. They're really saying I love you. I hear babies crying, I watch them grow. They'll learn much more, than I'll ever know. And I think to myself what a wonderful world. Yes I think to myself what a wonderful world." Louis Armstrong
Check out these awesome articles…
startupguide.com/world/the-world-is-actually-getting-better/
http://www.vox.com/2014/11/24/7272929/charts-thankful
http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty_1084_18-undeniable-facts-that-prove-world-getting-better
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/philip-d-harvey/how-the-world-is-getting-_b_2680402.html
Wednesday, March 23, 2016
Saturday, March 12, 2016
I am ready to be the REAL me
As I have been approaching my 40th birthday I have been reflecting on my life. What a wonderful journey this has been! I feel like I have finally figured out who I really am. Last spring around my 39th birthday I started waking up in the morning with my feet aching. It slowly got worse day by day. When I would wake up and take my first steps my feet were in so much pain. Then after awhile of being up and walking on them the pain would start to subside but never really go away. So after about 8 months of this I finally went to get a massage in November. The massage therapist asked me if I had any health issues. I said, "No I'm really healthy, the only thing is this issue with my feet that seems to be getting worse and worse." She paused for a moment and then asked me if I was resisting moving forward in an area of my life. The moment she asked I knew EXACTLY what it was. Yes, Yes, Yes!! For several months I had been having a very strong feeling that it was time to step into my life purpose and start my teaching. Although I had been teaching others things I've learned along the way for years but not fully as my main focus. I was making great money at my job and it was a difficult decision to let go of that security. But after the massage therapist had brought this to my attention I knew she was right and I had to let go of my fear and really step into the REAL me.
I started making plans and laying the groundwork. The thought that kept coming up for me was, "What day is the day to start living the life you were put on this earth for? What are you waiting for?" Even though a little bit of self-doubt and fear would creep up I would redirect and reach more for excitement. As I started making plans and taking action on my life purpose my feet pain was diminishing. My last day at my job was February 26, 2016. My first retreat with 19 women teaching my jewels I've learned along my journey was the following weekend March 4, 5 & 6th. What a beautiful experience with these beautiful women! Yesterday March 11, 2016 I turned 40 years old. My feet pain is gone and I have stepped into the REAL me. It feels amazing!!
I started making plans and laying the groundwork. The thought that kept coming up for me was, "What day is the day to start living the life you were put on this earth for? What are you waiting for?" Even though a little bit of self-doubt and fear would creep up I would redirect and reach more for excitement. As I started making plans and taking action on my life purpose my feet pain was diminishing. My last day at my job was February 26, 2016. My first retreat with 19 women teaching my jewels I've learned along my journey was the following weekend March 4, 5 & 6th. What a beautiful experience with these beautiful women! Yesterday March 11, 2016 I turned 40 years old. My feet pain is gone and I have stepped into the REAL me. It feels amazing!!
Thursday, August 6, 2015
I AM…Use With Caution But Use Often
These two words are the most powerful words you can use in a statement. Another word for I am is OM. These words translated actually mean God. They are words of declaration. When you use the words I am... you are telling the universe how it is. The universe hears these words and makes it truth in your life. Think of all the times you use this statement and what you put behind it.
I was sitting with a friend over coffee and listening to her talk. She was telling me about how her and her husband want to start trying to get pregnant with their first baby. I responded "Oh that's so awesome!" She immediately looked at me with a distraught look in her eye and said "But I am so scared! I am on all these medications because I am so depressed. I am so worried that if I quit taking my medications I am going to go crazy!" So just in that one statement she declared to the universe that I am...scared, crazy and depressed.
I asked her to stop and to think about that. Then I asked her to start making statements of what she does want in life instead. So we re-write that conversation. I say "Oh that's so awesome!" She then responds, "I know I am so excited! I am really working on my health and starting to feel great. I am exercising and eating healthy and I am looking forward to this next step in our life!"
I want people to start realizing their power. It takes one second to change your focus and it is a choice. Pay attention to how you are using these words and begin saying things like I am...filled with joy, beautiful, strong, fit, blessed, smart, wealthy, successful, loved, etc. You will start to see your life shift!
I was sitting with a friend over coffee and listening to her talk. She was telling me about how her and her husband want to start trying to get pregnant with their first baby. I responded "Oh that's so awesome!" She immediately looked at me with a distraught look in her eye and said "But I am so scared! I am on all these medications because I am so depressed. I am so worried that if I quit taking my medications I am going to go crazy!" So just in that one statement she declared to the universe that I am...scared, crazy and depressed.
I asked her to stop and to think about that. Then I asked her to start making statements of what she does want in life instead. So we re-write that conversation. I say "Oh that's so awesome!" She then responds, "I know I am so excited! I am really working on my health and starting to feel great. I am exercising and eating healthy and I am looking forward to this next step in our life!"
I want people to start realizing their power. It takes one second to change your focus and it is a choice. Pay attention to how you are using these words and begin saying things like I am...filled with joy, beautiful, strong, fit, blessed, smart, wealthy, successful, loved, etc. You will start to see your life shift!
Sunday, July 26, 2015
Ways to bring in the chi...
Summer nights are the best! Yesterday the weather was so beautiful that my kids and I were outside for about four hours riding bikes, sitting out on the lawn visiting with neighbors and having fun. Last weekend we had an 18th birthday party for our daughter with about 70 guests and a live band.
All this outdoor activity got us focusing on the outside space of our home making sure it was ready for this big party. When it comes to feng shui the outside of the home is just as important as the inside and some might say it may be even more important!
Your outdoor space is the first part of the home visitors (and you!) see when you drive up. If you come home to a yard full of weeds with long grass, cars that don't work and piles of junk on the side of the home, how does it make you feel? Probably, it immediately drains your energy.
How does your home rise up to greet you when you arrive?
This place you call your home is meant to be your haven; a place to rest and revive before you go back out into the busy bee world beyond its doors. If while in your home, you are constantly looking around at piles of things that translate into long lists of things to do, it is difficult, if not impossible, to rejuvenate. This is true both inside and out.
A client recently shared that although she's so busy at work, she dreads coming home after her long days at the office because her home is in such disarray. When she drives up to her house, the first thing that "slaps her into reality" is her yard full of weeds and dead spots of grass. Then she can't park in the garage because it's so full of junk. Even though she can't pull her car in, she still has to walk through the junk to get inside her home. Imagine how this feels.
What are you to do if this is your life? Feng shui offers some answers. It involves clearing clutter and organizing the environment in a way that promotes the positive, free flow of energy, or chi.
Take a weekend and focus on tidying up the lawn. Then focus on completely de-junking the garage to make space to park your car. Even hang a welcome sign in the garage to greet you when you arrive. This, or even a nice picture or something pleasant that makes you feel good, can make all the difference. There are endless ways to organize a garage, even when it stores many items. Shelving and hooks can provide need, organized, and safe storage for bikes, sports equipment and other items that call the garage their home.
As you look around your yard, do you see dead, sickly, or withering flowers and plants? If yes, start by throwing them away if they can't easily be nurtured back to health. You want to promote the flow of abundant energy from the outside into your home.
Place a beautiful pot of flowers next to the front door to get that healthy fresh chi flowing into your home. Remember to also pay attention to the backyard, too.
We've lived in our home for five years now. The back of our yard has a street behind it with a lot of activity going on. Our fence is a wrought iron fence that people can see right through. Every time we're in our backyard we feel we have no privacy. This year we decided to remedy that. We planted 12 evergreen trees that will eventually grow all together to create a wall of privacy. My family and I are already noticing how much more supported we feel by having those trees back there. Now we love being in our yard and can enjoy more fun, relaxing and private times together there.
Below (or above) you'll see our before and after photos of the backyard fence area. Isn't it so much more pleasing to see the green, healthy plants cushioning the metal fence? Doesn't it just seem more comforting, too? We think so!
Stop and pay attention to how you feel in your space. If there is something that bothers you, think about ways to change it to creating a beautiful escape both within and outside your home where you are safely nestled from the outside, busy world!
Before photo of my backyard
After photo of my backyard
All this outdoor activity got us focusing on the outside space of our home making sure it was ready for this big party. When it comes to feng shui the outside of the home is just as important as the inside and some might say it may be even more important!
Your outdoor space is the first part of the home visitors (and you!) see when you drive up. If you come home to a yard full of weeds with long grass, cars that don't work and piles of junk on the side of the home, how does it make you feel? Probably, it immediately drains your energy.
How does your home rise up to greet you when you arrive?
This place you call your home is meant to be your haven; a place to rest and revive before you go back out into the busy bee world beyond its doors. If while in your home, you are constantly looking around at piles of things that translate into long lists of things to do, it is difficult, if not impossible, to rejuvenate. This is true both inside and out.
A client recently shared that although she's so busy at work, she dreads coming home after her long days at the office because her home is in such disarray. When she drives up to her house, the first thing that "slaps her into reality" is her yard full of weeds and dead spots of grass. Then she can't park in the garage because it's so full of junk. Even though she can't pull her car in, she still has to walk through the junk to get inside her home. Imagine how this feels.
What are you to do if this is your life? Feng shui offers some answers. It involves clearing clutter and organizing the environment in a way that promotes the positive, free flow of energy, or chi.
Take a weekend and focus on tidying up the lawn. Then focus on completely de-junking the garage to make space to park your car. Even hang a welcome sign in the garage to greet you when you arrive. This, or even a nice picture or something pleasant that makes you feel good, can make all the difference. There are endless ways to organize a garage, even when it stores many items. Shelving and hooks can provide need, organized, and safe storage for bikes, sports equipment and other items that call the garage their home.
As you look around your yard, do you see dead, sickly, or withering flowers and plants? If yes, start by throwing them away if they can't easily be nurtured back to health. You want to promote the flow of abundant energy from the outside into your home.
Place a beautiful pot of flowers next to the front door to get that healthy fresh chi flowing into your home. Remember to also pay attention to the backyard, too.
We've lived in our home for five years now. The back of our yard has a street behind it with a lot of activity going on. Our fence is a wrought iron fence that people can see right through. Every time we're in our backyard we feel we have no privacy. This year we decided to remedy that. We planted 12 evergreen trees that will eventually grow all together to create a wall of privacy. My family and I are already noticing how much more supported we feel by having those trees back there. Now we love being in our yard and can enjoy more fun, relaxing and private times together there.
Below (or above) you'll see our before and after photos of the backyard fence area. Isn't it so much more pleasing to see the green, healthy plants cushioning the metal fence? Doesn't it just seem more comforting, too? We think so!
Stop and pay attention to how you feel in your space. If there is something that bothers you, think about ways to change it to creating a beautiful escape both within and outside your home where you are safely nestled from the outside, busy world!
Before photo of my backyard
After photo of my backyard
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
100 Ways To Get In The Vortex, Increase Your Chi, Or Raise Your Vibration
1. Hold a baby
2. Watch a funny movie
3. Pet a dog
4. Read an uplifting book
5. Go to lunch with a friend
6. Write in a gratitude journal
7. Make your favorite treat
8. Paint a picture
9. Go for a walk
10. Look through a magazine that feeds your creativity
11. Go on a picnic
12. Play hide and seek with a child
13. Cook a healthy dinner
14. Listen to uplifting music
15. Play a card/board game
16. Do a yoga class
17. Play an instrument
18. Plant a tree/flowers
19. Hang out with someone that makes you laugh
20. Go to a lake
21. Meditate
22. Listen to a spiritual/motivational leader podcast
23. Savor your favorite drink
24. Volunteer to help someone
25. Look at pictures of places you want to travel
26. Make a vision board
27. Take a candlelight bubble bath
28. Enjoy a glass of wine
29. Watch the sunset
30. Take a class to learn a new skill
31. Make-out (Yep get those lips smackin')
32. Watch Super Soul Sunday
33. Write a poem
34. Go look at cars you want to have
35. Jump on a trampoline like a little kid:)
36. Go out to eat at your favorite restaurant
37. Walk on the beach
38. Dance (drop it like it's hot)
39. Go pick fruit at an orchard
40. Write a story
41. Sing a song (like no one is listening)
42. Donate to a charity
43. Watch your favorite show (as long as it's light hearted)
44. Go enjoy coffee at a local cafe with a friend or a book
45. Shop for an outfit that you feel hot damn' in
46. Go horse back riding
47. Watch your favorite animated movie you watched as a kid
48. Have a water fight
49. Make home-made ice-cream
50. Go to your local pet store
51. Hand a homeless soul some cash
52. Say hi to every stranger you see that day
53. Eat a candle light dinner on the deck
54. Deep clean your home (because after it feels oh so good)
55. Send a loving text to 5 people
56. Spend 15 minutes saying out loud all the things you're thankful for in your life
57. Pull out your stash of past birthday cards written to you and read them
58. Take a nap
59. Get a pedicure/manicure
60. Practice mindfullness of being in the moment
61. Ride a bike
62. Read a story to children
63. Look in the mirror and say "I love you, I really really love you!" (Fo' Real, DO IT!!)
64. Be a complete goof, nerd corn-ball! It makes life fun:)
65. Go golfing (my favorite part is the drink carts with margaritas, haha!)
66. Look each person in the eye that you pass that day and smile
67. Go to a park and play like a kid
68. Fly a kite
69. Plan a party
70. Hang up pictures of people that make you happy
71. Put an ice-cube down a "playful" someones shirt:)
72. Wrestle and tickle with your Love or children
73. Choose a room in your home and redecorate it
74. Run through the sprinkler
75. Go pick a bouquet of wild flowers
76. Perform in front of a crowd
77. Enjoy a spiritual conversation with someone with an open mind
78. Bake cookies for a neighbor
79. Breathe (Take 3 deep cleansing breathes in through the nose out through the mouth)
80. Plant a garden
81. Go to a concert
82. Learn about a new culture and go to a restaurant with that food
83. Go to an art gallery or museum
84. Make home-made play dough
85. Get your hair did! (Damn I look good)
86. Karaoke with friends
87. Go to a local farmers market
88. Set up an outdoor movie and pop popcorn
89. Do a puzzle
90. Take a pottery class
91. Have a snowball fight
92. Go skiing/snowboarding
93. Go fishing
94. Get a massage
95. Go to an amusement park
96. Take a stroll at the zoo
97. Go laugh your buns off at a comedy club
98. Walk through a beautiful garden
99. Go hiking in the mountains
100. Make LOVE!!!
2. Watch a funny movie
3. Pet a dog
4. Read an uplifting book
5. Go to lunch with a friend
6. Write in a gratitude journal
7. Make your favorite treat
8. Paint a picture
9. Go for a walk
10. Look through a magazine that feeds your creativity
11. Go on a picnic
12. Play hide and seek with a child
13. Cook a healthy dinner
14. Listen to uplifting music
15. Play a card/board game
16. Do a yoga class
17. Play an instrument
18. Plant a tree/flowers
19. Hang out with someone that makes you laugh
20. Go to a lake
21. Meditate
22. Listen to a spiritual/motivational leader podcast
23. Savor your favorite drink
24. Volunteer to help someone
25. Look at pictures of places you want to travel
26. Make a vision board
27. Take a candlelight bubble bath
28. Enjoy a glass of wine
29. Watch the sunset
30. Take a class to learn a new skill
31. Make-out (Yep get those lips smackin')
32. Watch Super Soul Sunday
33. Write a poem
34. Go look at cars you want to have
35. Jump on a trampoline like a little kid:)
36. Go out to eat at your favorite restaurant
37. Walk on the beach
38. Dance (drop it like it's hot)
39. Go pick fruit at an orchard
40. Write a story
41. Sing a song (like no one is listening)
42. Donate to a charity
43. Watch your favorite show (as long as it's light hearted)
44. Go enjoy coffee at a local cafe with a friend or a book
45. Shop for an outfit that you feel hot damn' in
46. Go horse back riding
47. Watch your favorite animated movie you watched as a kid
48. Have a water fight
49. Make home-made ice-cream
50. Go to your local pet store
51. Hand a homeless soul some cash
52. Say hi to every stranger you see that day
53. Eat a candle light dinner on the deck
54. Deep clean your home (because after it feels oh so good)
55. Send a loving text to 5 people
56. Spend 15 minutes saying out loud all the things you're thankful for in your life
57. Pull out your stash of past birthday cards written to you and read them
58. Take a nap
59. Get a pedicure/manicure
60. Practice mindfullness of being in the moment
61. Ride a bike
62. Read a story to children
63. Look in the mirror and say "I love you, I really really love you!" (Fo' Real, DO IT!!)
64. Be a complete goof, nerd corn-ball! It makes life fun:)
65. Go golfing (my favorite part is the drink carts with margaritas, haha!)
66. Look each person in the eye that you pass that day and smile
67. Go to a park and play like a kid
68. Fly a kite
69. Plan a party
70. Hang up pictures of people that make you happy
71. Put an ice-cube down a "playful" someones shirt:)
72. Wrestle and tickle with your Love or children
73. Choose a room in your home and redecorate it
74. Run through the sprinkler
75. Go pick a bouquet of wild flowers
76. Perform in front of a crowd
77. Enjoy a spiritual conversation with someone with an open mind
78. Bake cookies for a neighbor
79. Breathe (Take 3 deep cleansing breathes in through the nose out through the mouth)
80. Plant a garden
81. Go to a concert
82. Learn about a new culture and go to a restaurant with that food
83. Go to an art gallery or museum
84. Make home-made play dough
85. Get your hair did! (Damn I look good)
86. Karaoke with friends
87. Go to a local farmers market
88. Set up an outdoor movie and pop popcorn
89. Do a puzzle
90. Take a pottery class
91. Have a snowball fight
92. Go skiing/snowboarding
93. Go fishing
94. Get a massage
95. Go to an amusement park
96. Take a stroll at the zoo
97. Go laugh your buns off at a comedy club
98. Walk through a beautiful garden
99. Go hiking in the mountains
100. Make LOVE!!!
Saturday, June 27, 2015
I Admire Her Balls!
This story comes at a time that is very fitting. Yesterday June 26, 2015 was a historic day. It was the day that all 50 states in the U.S. legalized gay marriage. It was fascinating to see this day finally come. I believe this to be a wonderful sign that the world is getting better. Giving everyone the same legal rights regardless of who they choose to love was the right choice.
Utah was among some of the first states to legalize same sex marriage. In October of 2014 they made the final ruling. I live in Utah so this was big news and a lot of people had their opinions against this new law. Utah is a very religious and conservative state. A couple weeks after this ruling I was at a Halloween party at one of my sisters home. My sister Janelle and I were standing there having a causal conversation with a lady we had known years before but hadn't seen in a very long time. We were asking about her children, husband, work etc just catching up on how things were in life.
All of the sudden this lady crinkles up her nose in disgust and says "Ew can you believe they just passed that law?" I knew exactly what law she was talking about but was so uncomfortable because I knew we didn't see eye to eye on this subject. Without any hesitation my big sis chimes in "Yeah and I think it's GREAT!!" The lady goes "You do?!?!" Janelle says "Yep I do!" as she shrugged her shoulders and walked off to find a more interesting conversation. As I stood there I thought to myself "Wow that's my sis and I admire her balls!" Here I am standing there trying to figure out what to say and she's already across the room moving on to something new.
She's always been that way. She has a brave heart that loves everyone (although she really does have a hard time loving people acting like a**holes). She doesn't even think twice about saying how she really feels which has definitely gotten her in trouble a time or two. She's amazing and I strive to be more like her speaking up for injustice when I see it. Every soul deserves the same rights. Love and respect to all! Yesterday was a beautiful day that I will always remember!
Utah was among some of the first states to legalize same sex marriage. In October of 2014 they made the final ruling. I live in Utah so this was big news and a lot of people had their opinions against this new law. Utah is a very religious and conservative state. A couple weeks after this ruling I was at a Halloween party at one of my sisters home. My sister Janelle and I were standing there having a causal conversation with a lady we had known years before but hadn't seen in a very long time. We were asking about her children, husband, work etc just catching up on how things were in life.
All of the sudden this lady crinkles up her nose in disgust and says "Ew can you believe they just passed that law?" I knew exactly what law she was talking about but was so uncomfortable because I knew we didn't see eye to eye on this subject. Without any hesitation my big sis chimes in "Yeah and I think it's GREAT!!" The lady goes "You do?!?!" Janelle says "Yep I do!" as she shrugged her shoulders and walked off to find a more interesting conversation. As I stood there I thought to myself "Wow that's my sis and I admire her balls!" Here I am standing there trying to figure out what to say and she's already across the room moving on to something new.
She's always been that way. She has a brave heart that loves everyone (although she really does have a hard time loving people acting like a**holes). She doesn't even think twice about saying how she really feels which has definitely gotten her in trouble a time or two. She's amazing and I strive to be more like her speaking up for injustice when I see it. Every soul deserves the same rights. Love and respect to all! Yesterday was a beautiful day that I will always remember!
Wednesday, June 24, 2015
What I Believe Our Teens NEED to Hear From Us
Having two teenagers has opened my eyes to a lot of things I was clueless to before. I constantly hear about how "This new generation has no work ethic, Our country is headed for big trouble when they grow up," blah, blah, blah!!!
There is actually a lot of unnecessary pressure put on this generation and I believe that parents, teachers and other adults are scaring the hell out of these kids. Here's a few reasons I have come to think this…
The suicide rate among kids 12-17 years old in Utah is one of the highest in the nation.
There is a huge amount of anxiety and depression among teens.
Teens seem reluctant to get their drivers license at 16 and start driving.
Self harming among teens has become very common.
I have had my kids tell me several times about a friend texting them about suicidal thoughts, or severe depression, or cutting etc. So many times they are worried sick about their friends. When my daughter told me for the first time about a boy she was friends with struggling with severe depression and suicidal thoughts she was 14 years old. I felt bad for this child but didn't realize that it was such a problem with the generation. Now my daughter is 18 years old and over the past few years there have been numerous times she has told me about a child she knows who is struggling with cutting, anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, and some who have actually committed suicide. I finally started thinking and then saying out loud, "What in the world is going on?? This isn't normal!!"
I started asking my friends and family about if they remember dealing with these kinds of issues as a teen. The answer from everyone has been no we didn't deal with issues this severe. Sure we had friends that maybe got mixed up in drugs, drinking, or had a teen pregnancy. But this generation is facing fear, fear, fear and full of pain!
I'm not exactly sure what is causing this immense fear in our children but I think we need to wake up and see that something is going on and change some messages we are reinforcing into our kids. First of all we need to quit looking down on this generation as if they will fail because of no work ethic. They are as a whole more brilliant and savvy than we will ever be. My five year old can pick up my cell phone and navigate through it easily. He also knows all of the codes to the four cell phones in our home. Anytime I have a question about my phone I hand it over to one of my teens to figure out.
One time my daughter was 16 and she came home from school. She said, "Mom I feel like teachers make you feel like it's impossible to succeed in life." It would seem like this is a ridiculous statement so I asked why she felt that way. She said, "They say you have to get straight A's, be in student council, extra curricular activities and clubs etc to even get in college." Then another time my son was about 13 years old and we were driving down the street and he says…"Hey mom do you ever worry about over population?" I said, "No never, why?" He said that in one of his classes they talked to the students about this and that it's really scary. Since then he has had his math, science and history class also talk about over population. What in the world is a 13 year old going to do about over population? The ONLY thing that will do is make these kids worry about something they have zero control over.
Parents put pressure on kids saying they don't want their kids to make the same mistakes they did. K I get it. I know we all want what's best for our children but at the end of the day they have their own path. Mistakes are part of life and MUST be made to learn. Many times we as parents also expect our kids to date the kind of person we want them to, follow the same religious beliefs that we believe, go into an acceptable profession that we see fit, etc. What our children need to hear from us is…
No matter what happens or what mistakes you make it will be OK. I am here for you, providing a safe place for you to come get wisdom and sound advice.
I don't expect perfection from you. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. I admire you for yours.
Go after whatever you want in life and I believe in you.
You get to choose your own decisions and it's your life. Find what brings you joy.
And above all there is NOTHING you can do to make me not love you, NOTHING!!!
Believe in your children and they will feel that from you. Guide them, don't try and control them. They will thank you one day!
I asked my teens what they need to hear from us…
Alex (18 yrs)
Your number one duty in life is to love everyone.
Learn from your mistakes and learn from others mistakes.
Do what makes you happy.
You are never alone because you always have people around you that are looking out for you and love you.
Austin (15 yrs)
Be yourself.
Go after your dreams.
I love you.
There is actually a lot of unnecessary pressure put on this generation and I believe that parents, teachers and other adults are scaring the hell out of these kids. Here's a few reasons I have come to think this…
The suicide rate among kids 12-17 years old in Utah is one of the highest in the nation.
There is a huge amount of anxiety and depression among teens.
Teens seem reluctant to get their drivers license at 16 and start driving.
Self harming among teens has become very common.
I have had my kids tell me several times about a friend texting them about suicidal thoughts, or severe depression, or cutting etc. So many times they are worried sick about their friends. When my daughter told me for the first time about a boy she was friends with struggling with severe depression and suicidal thoughts she was 14 years old. I felt bad for this child but didn't realize that it was such a problem with the generation. Now my daughter is 18 years old and over the past few years there have been numerous times she has told me about a child she knows who is struggling with cutting, anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, and some who have actually committed suicide. I finally started thinking and then saying out loud, "What in the world is going on?? This isn't normal!!"
I started asking my friends and family about if they remember dealing with these kinds of issues as a teen. The answer from everyone has been no we didn't deal with issues this severe. Sure we had friends that maybe got mixed up in drugs, drinking, or had a teen pregnancy. But this generation is facing fear, fear, fear and full of pain!
I'm not exactly sure what is causing this immense fear in our children but I think we need to wake up and see that something is going on and change some messages we are reinforcing into our kids. First of all we need to quit looking down on this generation as if they will fail because of no work ethic. They are as a whole more brilliant and savvy than we will ever be. My five year old can pick up my cell phone and navigate through it easily. He also knows all of the codes to the four cell phones in our home. Anytime I have a question about my phone I hand it over to one of my teens to figure out.
One time my daughter was 16 and she came home from school. She said, "Mom I feel like teachers make you feel like it's impossible to succeed in life." It would seem like this is a ridiculous statement so I asked why she felt that way. She said, "They say you have to get straight A's, be in student council, extra curricular activities and clubs etc to even get in college." Then another time my son was about 13 years old and we were driving down the street and he says…"Hey mom do you ever worry about over population?" I said, "No never, why?" He said that in one of his classes they talked to the students about this and that it's really scary. Since then he has had his math, science and history class also talk about over population. What in the world is a 13 year old going to do about over population? The ONLY thing that will do is make these kids worry about something they have zero control over.
Parents put pressure on kids saying they don't want their kids to make the same mistakes they did. K I get it. I know we all want what's best for our children but at the end of the day they have their own path. Mistakes are part of life and MUST be made to learn. Many times we as parents also expect our kids to date the kind of person we want them to, follow the same religious beliefs that we believe, go into an acceptable profession that we see fit, etc. What our children need to hear from us is…
No matter what happens or what mistakes you make it will be OK. I am here for you, providing a safe place for you to come get wisdom and sound advice.
I don't expect perfection from you. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. I admire you for yours.
Go after whatever you want in life and I believe in you.
You get to choose your own decisions and it's your life. Find what brings you joy.
And above all there is NOTHING you can do to make me not love you, NOTHING!!!
Believe in your children and they will feel that from you. Guide them, don't try and control them. They will thank you one day!
I asked my teens what they need to hear from us…
Alex (18 yrs)
Your number one duty in life is to love everyone.
Learn from your mistakes and learn from others mistakes.
Do what makes you happy.
You are never alone because you always have people around you that are looking out for you and love you.
Austin (15 yrs)
Be yourself.
Go after your dreams.
I love you.
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